How a Mom goes on vacation

Just got home from my trip to Florida sans husband and baby with a girlfriend, here's how a Mom goes on vacation said with gifs:

First you're all:

Your hair and makeup are done and you're wearing real pants for the first time in approximately 16 months
Shall we day drink? Oh okay but just one or two, I'm a Mom teehee
While checking out your hotness in the mirror of the bathroom the 22-year old hotties give you the "Gross why's she here?" look then giggle walking away.

So you have a few more and in the meantime your husband texts you a photo of your baby sleeping saying "Goodnight Mommy! We miss you!" Now you're sad... and drunk...

No, that's how you think you're crying.

There. That's more you. Now you miss your baby and girls are being mean to you.

Your friend suggests dancing to get your mind off things. Sweet, I've been working on this Beyoncé move I saw. You clear the floor ready to wow 'em all. It turns into:

By 8pm you're all

So you stumble home and tuck yourself in for the night

Wake up "refreshed" because you had a full night's sleep without having to wake up with a baby.

Your friend comforts you while you get rid of last night's martinis and Taco Bell

No but seriously it was super laid back. 

Thank God I went with someone who isn't in to the club scene. There wasn't any puking, or taco bell. There were martinis however and almost crying as I checked the photo album full of baby pictures roughly 23,345,978 times. We flew to Tampa and drove home stopping in Nashville and Milwaukee for the night. The last time I was in Nashville I was 22 and had a blast. This time was a whole different view point 7 years later. There was stumbling, girls wailing "Where's Jessica!?!?", ralphing, obnoxious frat boys and tears. We enjoyed the quieter places and turned in early every night. My how things have changed… 

I am home again with my 3 loves: Olivia, Rich and my puppy and I couldn't be happier. I missed changing her diapers, snuggling, and washing the apple sauce out of her hair. I won't be going on a trip without Olivia until she's at least 17 1/2 (years, not months.) 


  1. Bhahahaha. I can relate to every detail. Love it! XD

    1. Thanks for the blog roll shout out VIC! I love your blog :)


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